Welcome! I’m Jen!
I’m honored that you’ve landed here in my little corner of the Internet.
My perspective, “my lens,” is shaped by the death of my fiancé when he was just 40. That’s when I changed, literally, everything about my life.
I was 37 years old, and it seemed that my dream to start a family died with Jeff. Since Option A was no longer on the table, I vowed to kick the shit out of Option B.
I rekindled two cherished and long-delayed dreams. One to travel the world, the other to write a book. I traveled full-time for five years, stopping only when I met a man while walking the Camino de Santiago. Today, we live in France with our two sons and our golden retriever.
These are my stories, and this is my journey through grief, globe, and healing. It is my sincere hope that sharing these stories will help you, too.
Our Love Story
I wrote “An Immortal Love” just days after Jeff died and penned “When Cancer Changes Everything” while experiencing acute grief in the months that followed. “On Grieving the Loss of a Dream” was my perspective three years after his death.
The Day Everything Changed
Before I could grieve the loss of my dream for a family with Jeff, I needed to ride the unpredictable waves of acute grief caused by his death.
And I needed to work through a lot of anger.
Jeff was diagnosed with advanced esophageal cancer on Feb. 14, 2018 – our first Valentine’s Day together – and he was gone less than four months later. I wrote this bittersweet post on the anniversary of his diagnosis:
Walking in His Footsteps
One of the things that I did during my acute grieving season was to walk in Jeff’s footsteps. Just before I met him, he went on his one and only trip to Europe. Following Jeff’s path helped me heal. I saw signs of him every step of the way.
Traveling the World Solo
One month after Jeff died, I quit my job to travel the world. I was struck by the fact that – of the 296 days that I had with Jeff – I spent far too many nights away from him because of work trips.
In my previous life, I was a workaholic. I postponed my dreams to write a book and see the world. Then Jeff’s death taught me that life is too short to wait.
For me, there is life before Jeff and there is life after Jeff. I spent that first year after he died traveling the world solo and rediscovering myself and my soul’s purpose. I like to say that traveling solo taught me to unlearn myself:
Walking the Camino
Before I met Jeff, I didn’t even own a backpack. One year after he died, I decided to walk 500 miles across Spain on the Camino de Santiago. Out there on “The Way,” I decided not to return to my job and to start my own freelance writing business instead. I also made some other hard life decisions.
Post-Traumatic Growth
Walking the Camino served as the transition point for me between acute grief and embracing post-traumatic growth.
Grieving stripped me down to my barest self, revealing to me who I am and what I want to do with this precious gift of life.
I spent five years traveling full-time before I decided to walk the Camino de Santiago again. On that pilgrimage, I met a man, and, shortly after that walk, I moved to Provence to be with him. Today, we have two sons and a golden retriever. I still miss Jeff every day, and strive to live my life in a way that would make him proud.
Sharing My Healing Journey
I write here on this blog about my healing journey in the hopes that it will help others experiencing grief or life transitions. I am a meditation and yoga teacher, and I offer breathwork and mindfulness tips in addition to stories and guides for healing through travel.
Fun Facts
I’ve lived in:
- Chicago
- Washington D.C.
- Portland & Seattle
- Siena
- Bali
I grew up:
- cross-eyed
- in the Pacific Northwest
- without learning to ride a bike
- as an only child
- with two amazing parents
I’ve worked:
- for the Governor of Illinois
- for the President of the USA
- as the tourism director of IL
- for Homeland Security
- for myself!
I’m trained in:
- teaching meditation
- teaching yoga
- holistic healing
- trauma release exercises
- journalism (master’s degree)