At first, I felt guilty. My fiancé is gone, and I am living my life more fully than when he was here.
Since he passed over, I quit my job, started a freelance writing business, sold all of my stuff, embraced life as a nomad, started writing a book, and trained in holistic healing, yoga, meditation, breathwork, and tension & trauma release.
Jeff’s death taught me that life is too short to wait to pursue our dreams. Of course, I wish he were here every day. But, since he can’t be physically present, I honor his life by changing mine for the better.
Healing through Travel
Does travel heal? It certainly helped me. Before Jeff died I existed only in the confining but safe space of my comfort zone. It’s possible that I would have remained there, happy enough, but never truly living.
The week that Jeff died, I quit my job. One month later, I was on a one-way flight to Europe. Then Asia.
I pushed myself outside of my comfort zone and beyond my self-imposed limitations. I went to concerts and festivals alone, tried scuba diving lessons in Thailand, meditated with monks in Laos, observed a day of silence in Bali, learned to surf in Canggu, re-learned to ride a bike through the vineyards of France, and walked 500 miles across Spain.
Big changes for a girl who didn’t even own a backpack!
I learned to travel deeper. I learned to listen to what I really want in life. I learned to connect with the people and the legends of a place. I am still learning. I hope you’ll join me on the journey.
Healing with Mindfulness
When I first set out to travel the world after my fiancé died, I sometimes couldn’t see beyond my grief. Instead of exploring a new destination, I would explore my grief. I learned breathing techniques, meditation, gentle yoga, and spent a lot of time journaling. Then I walked across Spain on a 500-mile healing pilgrimage along the Camino de Santiago.
I believe that this time spent sitting with my grief helped me to transition from a journey through acute grief to an ongoing journey through healing.
If you are in a grieving season, I’m so sorry. It sucks. I’m not trying to sugarcoat grief, but this is a transformative period in your life.
When we sit with our grief and learn from its lessons, our lives are forever changed for the better. Grieving strips us down to our barest soul. It’s a painful process that also makes it easier to remember who we are at our very core.
Pursuing your true purpose is part of the post-traumatic growth journey, and in living your current life to the fullest, you honor what you lost.
It’s the scrapes that I regret. Most of us have them. Love marks. Metaphorical scars where new skin stretches protectively over old wounds that — sometimes — still tingle beneath the touch. I was forced to scan my scars this week when a friend sent me a message that exposed her own wounds. She wrote:…